The autumn equinox, or Mabon, came and went with out me being able to celebrate it. Unfortunately I was sick in bed. But it did leave me some time for thinking.
Mabon in pagan community is known as the holiday of the harvest. Literally and figuratively it's a time where you reap what you sow. There are many other associations and writings about the holiday and how it should be celebrated, but I usually love to give myself time to reflect, plan my next goals for the year, and make delicious food.
What I came to realize while I was laying sick in bed, is that i'm constantly planting and sowing. I'm so worried about the next harvest that I don't take the time to enjoy what i'm doing here and now. Instead, I'm letting my hard work die as soon as I harvest it and I don't get the chance to enjoy it. I'm already moving onto the next thing without giving myself a chance to rest. I think life was trying to tell me a little something this week when I was getting ill and the brake pedal of my car fell off.
I need to slow down and enjoy the work i'm doing. I need to choose what to focus on and really give that one (or two things because I can't help myself) thing all my focus and dedication. My creative process has fallen to the wayside, and that's what I need to be focusing on to make me happiest.
One little project i've had in mind that I want to start bringing into fruition is lifestyle blogging. I want to discover and develop a magical, fairy lifestyle that works for the modern busy lady. That way there's love, ritual and beauty in everything that is done. Creativity is being used. Connection to your inner self and earth is constantly being made. Those are my own personal goals I want to achieve and I want to be able to document it somehow.
So step number one for me, is making time to doodle and paint once a week. Completely for myself. Nothing freelance related. Nothing work related. I'm going to start with that one little thing and slowly work my way up as I can let go jobs and other not so fun and magical responsibilities.
Do you guys feel the same way? Are there changes in your life that you are wanting to be made but having a hard time finding the time to make a change? Let me know in the comments below!